Strangest Moments of My Past

There are some things in my Life where I want to relive particular incidents, and in time have lost many thoughts of those special people.

1. To be really honest with you guys, My first fight was with a gal (her name was Priyanka) and she was 17 yrs and I was just 11 yrs old. I have no idea what the argument was all about but it became so violent that she punched me on my lips and I ended up having bloody lips.
In a fit of rage, I aimed to punch her face but somehow I knocked her Breasts! (Thus came the height difference since I was really short).

That was the 1st time, I ever touched a woman's breasts! (completely unintentional).

But that was just an accident. Now I actually remember how much I loved fighting with this gal since the punch from this girl was really good and I really did enjoy the fist fights inside the school bus.
I have no idea where she is and what is she doing these days? But I really miss this "tomboy" woman and I hope you still remember me.

2. It was the International Children's Theater Film Festival 2002, and for the 1st time I had to dance a Waltz with this beautiful gal who was from Cambridge. Well, I really had fun dancing the waltz with this gal since she was the reason I wanted to learn the waltz and it was fun when we danced live in front of around 9 to 10 cameras aiming at you.

I was shit scared and I was as so pale in front of the cameras (as if She was dancing with a ghost). At the end of the dance, she comes to me, she laughs and says to me, "Nick, I'm waiting for the next dance".

I really miss the waltz n hope if she reads this, I would want to dance the Waltz once again with her. But I just can't remember her NAME !!!!!

Unreal

Forgive me father,
For I have sinned,
Ever imagined a world,
That we live in,
Isn’t real?

Questioning our existence,
I believe our existence is unreal,
The subject of life and death,
Seems far fetched once we think about it,
Are we alive or are we dead?

What if this world we live in,
Is just a dream?
Or it’s just a memory of the past?
Maybe we are dead,
Maybe we are just lost souls floating in this world,
And this world is just a place we souls imagine we live in.

The human mind has the tendency to believe in something that ensures happiness and satisfaction rather than to cause fear.

For e.g. People believe in love and people believe in love at first sight;
People believe in lust also, but people won’t believe in lust at first sight.
Well if you think about it,
It’s always lust at first sight because people actually have the fear of accepting it. People think lust is negative emotion and love is a positive emotion filled with happiness and joy.

Another example,

Let’s take the phase of life and death. Why do people think life is such a happy occasion and death is filled with sadness and sorrow?

Life and death are just two different words with the same internal meaning. It’s like taking two different worlds in a parallel universe. For one world’s death is another world’s life and vice versa. But for both the worlds it holds the same meaning.

Sometimes I also wonder about these two words; fate & destiny. Some people may believe in it and some may not. Others may just have a quiet opinion about it. Well if you think about it fate and destiny, they have the same function like life and death but have a different meaning.
These two words are just a script handed down to one’s body, mind and soul. You have no control over your life because you are just a puppet of someone who has a higher power.
Being a rebel doesn’t make a difference since it’s already written in that script which you are carrying around your entire life.
Your every body movement, judgments, decisions, thinking, perception, communication, work, likes, dislikes, beliefs, you name it, the reason for your existence is written in that script.

One’s life is just a live-film and you are the lead character. In a world of a population of over 2 billion, hasn’t anyone realized that you are the main character of your life?

We seem to live in a world built with fear,
A world that doesn’t seem to accept the real from the unreal,
A world where reality’s acceptance is one’s fear,
The world is changing,
Around two or three decades back, every movie seemed to have a happy ending,
Also some of the greatest movies have inspired people for a long time,
But some contemporary movies haven’t had the best of mankind.

Our world has grown in the name of fear,
It has motivated and built itself with the help of fear.
Electricity, food, medicines and communication etc- what if only country or one nation has it?
Fear would strike other nations and with the help of that fear, it slowly learns to create their own marvels.


Many people would think is the “crazy” talk, or this is non-sense. I may not have any evidence to my thesis but in my defense I would just ask people to think about your existence. Some people may seem to ignore this fact, which proves my first point and that is the fear of accepting which is unreal or something which brings about a negative feeling inside a person.
Everything happens for a reason, but some things are just planned and you would have no option to just follow that path.

Just Another Thought

There are times,
When I look into her eyes,
Thinking... whether is she the one?
Expressing her Love,
Expressing her Hate,
On an unworthy Soul,
Seems like a dagger that's been stabbed back & forth on this worthy soul.

Sometimes I hate myself,
Being friends is pointless,
It's a waste of time,
There's nothing called Love or Friendship,
Perhaps... I would agree with Lust and Repugnance,
Greed and Gluttony,
Envy and Wrath.

Questioning self is something that cannot be stopped,
It makes life more interesting,
Except for one question,
And that is... Do I Exist?
Existence seems fruitless.

Kill me Sane World

Life seems so monotonous,
Versatility where are you?
Where the hell are you?
I've been waiting for a Change all my life,
Life's like a song,
Sometime it's Life Rocks,
Sometime it's Life Sucks,
But... that's "Life".

I need something different,
Bored with the same old daily routine from pathetic life,
Eat-Drink-Sleep,
Is that life?
Social, Personal, Professionals,  None of these - a happiness.
Then what is Life?

Some say Life is a blessing bestowed upon us by the Holy One,
Some say Life is a way of living,
Some say Nothing,
But for me,
Life is seems like a mysterious curse,
We are born as pure souls of that live in this impure world,
Some see this through but others just choose to ignore,
The world we live upon is Hell,
We become tormented souls by the darkness of this world,
This is the world we live in,
A world of filled with endless insanity.

People believe in God,
People believe in the Almighty
People believe in the Holy One,
I don't believe...

Every devoted person submit their souls to the almighty,
That's a life's fear,
I don't wont my life to be controlled by an external power,
I want to control my life,
I want to control my destiny,
And I want to control my Fate,
No one Controls my life.

But my life's just beginning,
So many things to do,
So many things to see,
So many things to feel,
So many things to taste,
So many things to smell,
So many things to experience.

At times I wonder,
Where would I be in 20 or 30 years from now?
Where would this crazy insane person be?
Whether I would still be alive?
Or whether I would be dead?
Would Life control me?
Or Whether I would Control my life?

Love is Life,
Life isn't Life,
But since I don't have either of them,
What's the use of Love and Life?
If there isn't any Love,
There's no hate,
If there's no life,
There's no death,
So the conclusion here is,
No love, No life,
No hate, No death...

So I can't die nor can i live?
Great!

So again I draw another conclusion,
I'm just existing,
Existing without Love or Life, Death or Hate.
In this hell,
The only thing that would defy my existence,
Would be Me,
A clutter of anger, desperation, jealousy,
Clogged in this sane mind,
Kill me sane world,
Let me Rust in Peace!

Closed Chapters

There was a friend,
How fast we blend,
So much Understanding,
So much trust,
Had it all come to rust,
Hey old friend,
Is this the end?

Smoking & Drinking,
Dancing & Boogieing,
Hogging & Riding,
Laughing & Crying,
We shared happiness together,
Thinking it would last forever & ever.

Close Chapters of my life,
Never found anything nice,
Ended up in strife,
Long term jealousy,
Lifetime of envy,
These are Close chapters of my Life.

Still Loving you,
Angel of darkness,
Goddess of my destruction,
Savior of my wounds,
Addicted to this poison,
That's my confession.

With her,
A Joyful tomorrow,
Never ending,
Pains of sorrows,
Numb forever,
Beauty of hers,
Mesmerizing and so tender,
Trusting her,
That's the only error.

Closed Chapters of my life,
Was there anything nice?
Ending with a bloody knife,
Gimme a second chance,
To fulfill this Romance,
But sweetheart,
These are Close chapters of my Life.

Mr. Rock Crow

Hey Mr Rock Crow,
Sitting by my window,
Please tell me what to do?
Oh, What to do ?

Hey Mr Rock Crow,
Sitting by my window,
Why don't you tell me?
What should I do ?
Oh, What to do?

Hey Mr Rock Crow,
How's my Afro?
Oops,
Let me get to the Intro...

Your my Angel,
Set your white wings upon this hell,
Let your beauty give me that tantalizing spell,
And Embrace me in your groovy shell.
That's what i said,

She locked me on her bed,
Thought I was dead,
Fluffy Pillow by my head.

Never took her so long,
Just to remove her lil red thong,
Oh damn,
I'm getting laid,
Hey what the fuck?
I'm getting Slayed !!!

Hey Mr Rock Crow,
Sitting by my window,
Please tell me what to do?
Oh, What to do?

Hey Mr Rock Crow,
Sitting by my window,
Why don't you tell me?
What should I do ?
Oh, What to do?

Thinking about her for so long,
Wondering where I went wrong?
Adoring her was all i could do,
Ignoring me is all she can do,
But what the hell,
She was just a Virgo.

Hey Mr Rock Crow,
A long time ago,
I felt like a Kickass Pharaoh,
Coming a long way from Blazing Cairo.

Smoking n Drinking,
Coughing n Puking,
Bloody floors,
I choose to ignore,
What's this pain?
Am i going Insane?

Falling in the darkness,
Running away from the sadness,
Waiting to hit the ground,
Patience of the breaking sound.

Here's comes the death,
Here comes the end...

Oh wait,
That's My friend,
Thats Mr Rock Crow,
Your my hero,
Hey, that's a nice Afro!
Here comes Mr Rock Crow to rescue.

Hey Mr Rock Crow,
Sitting by my window,
Let's rock n roll all night long,
Coz this is an endless song !!!

Rhyme Sinfully to The Carnival of Lust

Walking down the Sin Lane,
With the Heavens going Insane,
Bolts of Blazing Lights,
As if the Elements were at Fights.
And the Darkness in your sights.
And there's no way to Hide!

Up ahead in the distance,
A Structure of Elegance,
Massive Stones of Beauty,
So Naked n yet so Creepy,
Wondered what was this Sinister Place?
Marvelous and full of Grace.

Welcome to the Carnival Of Lust,
Where there's no one to trust.
And Lust is the only must,
Hearts n Souls burn to dust,
Welcome to the Carnival of Lust.

Love is dull,
Love is boring,
Love is dead,
Thats what it said.

Demonic aura surrounds,
No place so powerful as it sounds,
Love is dead,
And that's what it said.

Angels & Demons,
Lucifer and Satan,
Succubus of your dreams,
Sirens of immense screams,
Lust is just a toy,
Filled with Joy.

Making Lust without Love,
Burning with sexual fantasies,
Boogie with all the foxy ecstasies,
Ballads of the KamaSutra.

Welcome to the Carnival Of Lust,
Where there's no one to trust.
And Lust is the only must,
Hearts n Souls burn to dust,
Welcome to the Carnival of Lust.


One thing crystal clear.
That Lust in every tear,
And Love is the only fear.

Over to Nightmare Street,
Opposite Death End,
On Bloody road,
With no one to trust,
Hearts n Soul burn to dust,
Welcome to the Carnival of Lust.

Little Nicky

Swimming through the sea of lost souls,
Blinded by the elements,
One's the darkness,
The other- A thick fog.

Finding his Paradise,
Aided by the Miss Pirate,
Dancing over her pot of Gold,
She was beautiful, vivacious, angel but a devil in disguise,
Instantly Attracted was the lad,
Addicted to the Sex, Drugs n Rock N Roll,
Shared a Love of Lust raising a question of trust,
Coming to a bitter end,
The lad stole her Rum,
Guilty was he charged,
And he walked the plank and found the darkness again.

Swimming through the sea of lost souls,
Blinded by the elements,
One's the darkness,
The other- A thick fog.

Finding his way home,
Aided by Sharky,
Fangs of Silver,
Jaws of Steel,
Wickedly he smiled,
Cunningly he stared,
Shared a friendship of eternity,
Went further into the darkness unknowingly,
Starvation hit Sharky,
Arrogant and Crazy was the lad,
Chipped of a fang from the Predator!

Once again Lonely was the Lad,
Swimming through the sea of lost souls,
Blinded by the elements,
One's the darkness,
The other- A thick fog.

Crying in the darkness,
Abusing the thick fog,
Questioning the Elements,
"When will i reach home?"
"How far is my Home?"

Gazing through the darkness,
A siren sings,
Mesmerizing was her voice,
Shrieking through the fog,
Clearing out elements of misery,
"This is Hell",
"This is your home!", she chanted.

Swimming through the sea of lost souls,
Blinded by the elements,
One's the darkness,
The other - A thick Fog.

A Tale of a Lad,
Who was mad,
Darkness was his sadness,
He was a lost soul,
Cloaked with a thick n foul fog.
Swimming through an ocean of darkness,
He was Little Nicky.

Brothers of Life....

Brothers of life,
Lost over the time,
Never ever had been so serene,
With my brothers of life.

Growing up together,
Dancing together,
Riding together,
Rock n Roll together,
Achieving Nirvana together,
Never ever had been so serene,
With my brothers of life.

Wished for the equal things in life,
Laughing at the obstacles of life,
Painting the picture of a techincolored life,
Sadness of wasn't a part of our life,
Never ever had been so serene,
With my brothers of life.

Dreams were so clear,
Crystal Clear,
Life was Clear,
Goals were clear,
Endless time with my brothers,
The best things of live never ended,
Never ever had been so serene,
With my brothers of life.

Enter the devil,
Silent Assassin was the evil,
Entering the tunnel,
Tunnel of paradise,
Lurking through the tunnel of paradise,
Seeing the bright light through the darkness,
Covered it up with this demonic aura,
Never thought it would come to an end,
Disputes,
Anger,
Frustration,
Pain,
Sadness,
Envy,
Gluttony,
Shame,
Hit us all,
Wounded was I,
Blamed my brothers for the grievance,
Succumbed to my Injuries.

Wake up,
Get Up,
What the fuck?
Was that a bad dream,
Was that a nightmare,
No...

It's reality,
It had happened,
In the past.

Give me one more chance,
Let's relive the past,
Let's forget the wounds,
Scars is all that remains,
Let's go back to the tunnel to paradise,
The times of yore,
Remains in the graves,
Passing through the sands of time,
Never to be relived,
Kill the devil,
Banish his presence,
Together with my brothers,
Empty was I,
Allow me come back to life,
Because...
Never ever had been so serene,
With my brothers of life.


(To all my brothers)

What the F*uk !

LAST:
1. Last beverage→ Beer
2. Last phone call→ Nilesh
3. Last text message sent - Vodafone care center so as to check my bill !
4. Last song you listened to→ Master Exploder by Tenacious D
5. Last time you cried→ Couple of months back.

HAVE YOU EVER:
6. Dated someone twice →yes
7. Been cheated on? → yes
8. Kissed someone & regretted it? → yes.
9. Lost someone special?→ No
10. Been depressed?→ Yes...
11. Been drunk? → Yes..
LIST THREE FAVORITE COLORS:
12. Black
13. Red
14. Green :D

THIS YEAR HAVE YOU:
15. Made new friends→ Ohh Yea !
16. Fallen out of love → Unfortunately yes
17. Laughed until you cried → No
18. Met someone who changed you→ No
19. Found out who your true friends were→ Really Hard to judge "true" but yea Ive got good friends for now.
20. Found out someone was talking about you - No, I'm the least spoked about person.

TRUTH:
23. How many kids do you want to have→ None
24. Do you have any pets → Yes, 2 of them..a dog n a parrot :)
25. Do you want to change your name→ No
26. What did you do for your last birthday→ Partied with friends n had towers of beer.
27. What time did you wake up today → 8am
28. What were you doing at midnight last night→ Sleeping
29. Name something you CANNOT wait for → Money
30. Last time you saw your father→ A month back
31. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life → Friends n Location
32. What are you listening to right now → Silence
33. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom → No but I've Chatted with a person named Jerry.
34. What's getting on your nerves right now? → Exams !
36. Whats your real name → Niki Mitra
37. Relationship Status → Single
38. Zodiac sign → Virgo
39. Male or female→ Male
40. Elementary→ Muscat
41. Middle School → Muscat/Mumbai (7th STD onwards from Mumbai)
42. High school →Mumbai
43. Hair color → Black
44. Long or short → Long
45. Height → 5'9"
46. Do you have a crush on someone? → Yes
47. What do you like about yourself? → Patience
48. Piercings → Yes, 3 of them
49. Tattoos → None for now but i really wanna get one wicked tribal tattoo.
50. Righty or lefty → Lefty

FIRSTS :
51. First surgery → Never had 1.
52. First piercing → 10th Std
53. First tattoo → Don't have any for now.
54. First best friend → There are many...being too diplomatic but still cant judge em by superlatives.
55. First sport you joined --> Cricket
56. First pet → Love Birds.
57. First vacation→ Ahoy Goa !
58. First concert → Im not into Social Gatherings.
60. First alcohol drink→ Vodka n I hate it !
RIGHT NOW
61. Eating → Sandwich
62. Drinking → Water
63. I'm about to → Study for the finals, n complete atleast one subject today.
64. Listening to → the traffic below.
5. Waiting for → Parents to come from pune n play with my dog.

YOUR FUTURE :
66. Want kids? → Not expecting any.
67. Want to get married? → Never thought about it.
68. Careers in mind? → Creative, Designer,Copywriting,Graphics, Visualizer anything related to the creative of an ad agency.

WHICH DO YOU PERFER?
69. Lips or eyes → Lips
70. Hugs or kisses → Both
71. Shorter or taller → Doesn't matter.
72. Older or Younger → Age isn't a factor for me.
73. Romantic or spontaneous → Both
74. Nice stomach or nice arms → What?
75. Tattoos or piercings → Both
76. Sensitive or loud → Sensitive
77. Hook-up or relationship → Anything that i can get.

HAVE YOU EVER :
79. Kissed a stranger → No
80. Drank hard liquor → Yes
81. Lost glasses/contacts → I don't wear them.
82. Kiss on first date → Yes
83. Broken someone's heart → Yes once
84. Had your own heart broken → Yes 3ice
85. Been arrested → No, But i want to get arrested.
86. Turned someone down → No
87. Cried when someone died → No
88. Liked a friend → Yes

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
89. Yourself → Sometimes. Keeps changing ends.
90. Miracles → Nope
91. Love at first sight → I believe in Lust at 1st sight.
92. Heaven → I'm an Atheist
93. Santa Claus → A long long time ago.
94. Kissing on the first date → Yes
95. Angels → Devilns

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY:
96. Is there one person you want to be with right now? → Yes.
97. Had more than one boyfriend/girlfriend at one time? → No
98. Do you believe it’s possible to remain faithful forever?→ Yes.
99. What's the one thing you cannot live without?→ Money
100. One thing that most people don’t know about you → I'm Still a Virgin.